Sunday, June 28, 2020

#335



“That roof is the wrong shape to talk to God.”

Chloe Reed hears this inside her head when she looks up in a coffeeshop, her house, her church, everywhere she goes. And the strange, static-laden voice is getting louder with each repetition.

It tells her she’s been chosen to build a correctly shaped roof.

Chloe bounces between thinking she’s going insane and hoping she’s been singled out to talk to God. She needs it to be the latter. She needs to know God loves her, that anyone loves her. She needs to know why her own father doesn’t even want to be in the same room as her.

She builds the roof and puts it on a shed in her backyard. She steps inside. The distorted voice that had been confined to her head crackles down at her from the roof. Chloe prostrates herself on the wooden floorboards.

The voice tells her it’s God. It tells her it has a plan and it needs her help. But it’s not the God she was expecting. This one doesn’t know who Jesus is.

Chloe must find out if the voice belongs to God. If it does, Chloe finally has concrete proof that she’s worthy of love. She finally has a way to get all the answers.

But the voice wants more than her faith. It wants all of humanity to believe. It wants total control. And it needs Chloe to get it.

CHLOE’S ROOF (80,200 words) is a work of speculative fiction. This would be my debut.

Put your comps here. Yes, you need them.
Put your bio here. Yes, you need one.

Thank you for your time and consideration.
This is clear, concise, well-written.
It works for me, I'd read the pages.

But, this is not going to appeal to every agent.
Which means even a clear, concise, well-written query is going to get some passes. 

Any questions?



 

4 comments:

Mike said...

Is there a specific reason this one needs comps, or are you saying all queries need comps?

Theresa said...

Nicely done. I'd pick this one up.

LynnRodz said...

I'm intrigued and I want to know what shape that roof is. What I don't understand is why does God need a girl to help him gain total control of humanity when, after all, he's God? If He wants total control he can have total control, which then brings me to a logical conclusion. Still, I would probably read this. Good job.

Kim Aippersbach said...

This is an awesome premise; I would totally read this.