After Ellie’s fiancé dumps her on Valentine’s Day, she finds herself deep in debt, deep in doubt and deep in despair.
Determined to pay off her loans and avoid romantic distractions, Ellie vows to live in poverty and celibacy until her life is back on track. While trying to wrangle a full-time job at her bank, she mops floors and rents a cheap room in a decrepit boarding house with a group of eccentrics.
Then things get weird.
Her house-mates form a punk band called ‘Anal Leakage’. They purloin Ellie’s angst-filled poems about her ex-fiancé, turn them into lyrics and upload the songs to the Web.
Around town, terrible rumours begin circulate about Ellie as she fights to regain control of her destiny. Unaware of her growing online popularity as Anal Leakage’s mysterious lyricist, Ellie puzzles over the nature of love, her purpose in life and the obsessed Japanese fan on her doorstep.
Right here is where I say "huh?" We've got her as the unknowing muse, but how does that segue into "terrible rumors" and "fight to regain control of her destiny". Surely she'll just consult a copyright lawyer and sue for a lifetime supply of CDs while waiting for an endorsement deal from Depends? And honestly doesn't every one have a deranged fan on their doorstep these days? Oh wait..just me?? Hmm.
She endures a year of lost love, lost friendship, public humiliations, vendettas, misunderstandings, vile rumours, lawsuits, and conspiracies until she finds love and direction once more, and a bit of sweet revenge.
Who's the antagonist? What are the stakes? I know this is a humorous romance, but you still need those things.
I have been previously published in Spinetingler Magazine and Storyteller Magazine. (Credit list available)
Mental Notes is a humorous romance, complete at 75,000 words. I would like to submit my novel for your consideration.
I'm profoundly grateful you did not name the novel for the band.